The Frightening Feminist Freak
“I would never marry a feminist.”
“I think women should get equal rights and all, but I wouldn’t consider myself a feminist.”
“I know I’m a girl, but I’m not a feminist.”
“I don’t get the point of feminism. Women are already treated equally today.”
All of the statements above have been expressed by Provo residents, generally unaware that they were, in fact, in the presence of a self-proclaimed feminist. Now, before you get concerned that a scary feminist boogeyman could be lurking in the midst of your social circle, let’s address why feminism is actually so scary to some and what the effects of a fear of feminism might be.
I believe there is an irrational and unhealthy fear of feminism in the Provo community sprung from a severe misunderstanding of the meaning and motive of modern feminism. In my experience, there exists three main misunderstandings of feminism. First, feminism is often considered “too radical”, angry, and vengeful. Second, many people believe that feminists don’t actually want equality, but want to control the world and put men down. Third, many people believe that feminism will overturn existing gender roles, leading to negative effects on marriage and families.
In order to address these claims, it’s important to understand what feminism is. In its most simple meaning, feminism is advocacy for equal rights and opportunities for women. The first two accusations honestly may apply to some feminists, but that doesn’t change the basic definition of feminism that the majority of advocates adhere to--this is, at its core, a movement for equal rights and treatment, although the means to achieve this end might differ among different feminists. The last accusation certainly might seem frightening to those that benefit from the status quo, but gender roles in work, marriage, families, and other social relationships is exactly where issues exist. Mothers can generally get jobs if they want, but are oftentimes still expected to do the majority of cooking, cleaning, and childcare even after similar work hours to her husband. So, while some might fear the social and familial change that feminism will bring, this is a change that needs to happen if equality is truly to be achieved..
Now, many people might say, “well I’m fine with social change as long as it is reasonable and not radical.” I’m not here to argue the best way that feminists can achieve their goals--through radicalism or not. I’m not even here to argue that you should be a feminist (although you really should be). I’m here to argue that this culture of fear surrounding feminism is harmful and actually sexist in and of itself. I’m here to argue that if you believe that both genders should be treated equally and that something should be done to stop rape, sexual harassments, and gender stereotypes, then you are, in fact, a feminist, and refusing to label yourself as such is actually a hindrance to a movement trying to end the very things you claim to oppose. I’m here to argue that this culture of fear of feminism actually socially limits women who are feminist from having a voice and advocating for equality that has not quite been achieved. I have friends that are too scared to admit to some of their friends or family members that they consider themselves a feminist. This fear ends up silencing members of a movement that is crucial to achieving gender equality.
So, if I have one more conversation with someone that begins, “I’m not a feminist or anything, but there is a serious problem with sexual harassment and something needs to be done about it,” (an actual conversation I have had), then I will certainly point out that this 1) Hinders solving the issue of sexual harassment by delegitimizing and socially silencing a group that advocates for change in this arena 2) Is a contradictory and illogical statement. If you think changes should be made to provide better and equal treatment of women, then you are a feminist. You just are and stop denying it, as doing so is actually anti-feminist and sexist.